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sibling yin and yang

What a difference a day makes. Last night Mom and I went to Butch and Kristen's to settle the stag matter. At first we were all making small talk and I was just about ready to explode. I kept trying to make eye contact with Mom, but she wasn't looking my way. When I was on the verge of blurted something out, Mom asked Butch and Kristen if they had resolved this issue. They had trouble even talking about it.

I was having trouble controlling myself, but I asked why, what specifically about the stag bothered Kristen, she was so opposed to it, rather is, but I'll get to that. It seems she was confusing a bachelor party with a stag and we explained that Mark will be roasted and then the guys will play cards to raise money for him.

I ended up saying that I don't think I'm normally a selfish person, but this is about Mark and me and supporting us in our life together. I also mentioned I'm sick of people being selfish, this is not the time. I don't plan on doing this again, so this is special. I told Butch, I love you and I love Mark and I want you to be there, Mark wants you to be there. Mom also said, I don't think I ask a lot of you, but I would like Butch to be there, he's part of the wedding party and he should be there.

I asked Butch what he thought and he said he wanted to go, but Kristen would get mad.

I'm know I'm saying things out of order, but you get the gist. I also said that I can be very stubborn if I want to be, and I'm being stubborn about this. Then I pointed out that Butch didn't need to stay all night long, just for the beginning of it.

Kristen knew that she was being selfish and didn't really mean to and she did say, this is about you and Mark. And things were (are) good. Butch hugged me and whispered thank you. I told him, You're welcome. See? I knew I'd get my way. He hugged me for a long time and I kissed him on the neck because he's so tall that I couldn't reach his cheek.

Kristen had heard some wild stories I guess and felt threatened by Butch going. I think we helped allay some fears.

Mom and I finished our walk after that and we were talking about things, how we felt good the way things were left and perhaps our talk would encourage Butch and Kristen to talk about things.

It turns out, it did and Kristen called me this morning to thank me and mentioned how it really helped the two of them. I told her that Butch and I are at a disadvantage in that we never had to try to get along, it just happened. We complement one another. I also mentioned the complementing point to Mom last night on our walk and it hit me, as I believe it has in the past. In that moment I knew what yin and yang was, together mine and Butch's relationship is yin and yang. He's strong where I'm weak and I'm strong where he's weak, but together we win battles.

This situation wasn't a true battle, but it's one my brothere needed me to fight for him, or at least extend a helping hand and not back down. But the really great thing is that I don't feel bad about what was said and it helped the two of them. And my brother is going to the stag, where he belongs.